Exercise Forty-Nine

Ocean InstaWhen common themes start appearing in your life, you need to listen. This past week, mine (and I suspect many of you will have the same one) has been “balance.” I know that when I am out of balance — when I’ve over-committed, slept too few hours, run full-tilt for too long — my body lets me know. But, the other thing that happens is the messages around me start getting really loud. The sermons at Unity become about balance, our Mastermind Group talks about the spiral of people-pleasing, posts on Facebook point to letting go, and I’m compelled to re-read my own blog posts.

In light of all this, I’m going to share Cheryl Richardson’s Absolute Yes List as the exercise this week. “Put your self-care above anything else—say no unless it’s an absolute yes. Choose to spend your time and energy on things that bring you joy and make decisions based on what you want instead of what others want. If you don’t set boundaries and take care of yourself, your health and well-being are at stake. And, if you are neglecting yourself, you aren’t helping your family and others around you.”

This may be one of the harder exercises to implement. Saying “yes” is often automatic. Pausing and checking in with yourself and asking if you are 100% in favor of saying yes is difficult. The fear of disappointing others makes it even more so. I’ll let you in on a secret, it gets easier with practice and you’ll discover that absolute yeses mean that you will find the time to do the things that matter most to you. If this seems a bridge too far, choose one day this week to do focus on absolute yeses. Next week, make it two days. Keep it up until it feels comfortable. I’m going to end this by reaching back to a favorite poem I introduced in one of my earlier posts – God Says Yes to Me by Kaylin Haught. Enjoy!

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